Success? Break up!

A friend told me about a film, which I've failed to google search the title. The story of that film goes something like this: A man and a woman, who were in a relationship. The man is a writer and the woman is a dancer. They lived a struggled life, and one day, the writer's talent fot discovered and he become successful. Whereas the dancer is still struggling in her dancing career. She gets emotional and lost her self esteem. She started to envy of her boyfriend's success. In the end of the movie, they broke up.

Will you leave your spouse during his/her tough times which he/she unable to get through it by his/herself? Or you will find a way to help him/her to go through it no matter how much you sacrifice your own benefits?

Life is full of ups and downs, if a man unwilling to go through that down season of a woman, that relationship will not last long. I want to write about my mom and dad's story about their hard times. There was a time when my dad was so addicted on gambling, that my mom had made a decision to move to another place. She told my dad to leave his gambler friends and go somewhere new to start a new life. So my dad did chase after her and he ended his gambling habit.

The difficult time doesn't just end there, My dad got diabetes and need cardiovascular operation, he got very sick. Since he no longer eligible for insurance, my mom has to borrow money from her relatives to pay for the surgery. 

This is the real example of love. Both will not give up during the difficult time. Sometimes, outsiders might say it is not fair for my mom. Things cannot be judged by its surface. Sometimes, my friends will tell me they really envy of my parent's because they still holding hands, my dad sometimes still "kacao kacao" joking with my mom, they still sleeping on the same bed...etc. The conclusion is, how much you had sacrificed, you will get back more of it. Some old couple not even speak to their spouse. Some not even holding hands. Some no longer sleeping next to each other... 

Younger couples nowadays are less resilient towards difficult times. I have to admit that. If one party unwilling to find a solution for the trouble of hisher spouse. That's the end of it. A relationship is about both parties. If one party unwilling to go through the tough times with his/her spouse, it's not going to work. That goes to that successful writter who gave up the relationship. 

My mom could have just leave my dad during his gambling habit time. That way, she might not need to suffer the financial troubles which my dad had brought into the family. And she may not have to go through all the troubles of taking care of my sick dad. That supposed to be an easy way out. All those financial security is worthless, compare to holding the hands of someone she loves. This is how she values a relationship. And my dad didn't have to chase after her that time when he was into gambling. There were examples of others where the husband will beat the wife and continue gamble. Therefore I say it is all about both parties. My dad must willing to change himself. One thing good about him, he never lay hands on my mom.

How you value a relationship? Will you willing to g through all the difficult time with your partner even though it is not going to be fair for you? In the end, no relationship will be fair because one of the person will always have to go first and left the other one alone. It is about being togather that matters.

For that writer who unwilling to go through the tough time with his girlfriend.